Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Teaching our kids to LOVE their HAIR


Growing up as an only girl, my mother would take me to the hairdresser every Saturday. It was a ritual.  After pancakes, then it was time to go to get my hair done. I don't remember having conversations about hair care with my mother. Even into my adulthood, such a conversation never took place. The only information I got about hair care was either from my stylist or friends. I didn't have the luxury of the INTERNET or Hair Forums and Meetups.

I feel blessed to have two beautiful girls, whose characters are as different as their hair texture/types.  Big Sis is my gentle spirit and always willing to help others and learn from them, while Lil Sis is adventurous and her active and sometimes wild spirit keeps me on my toes.

Afraid to repeat history, I started teaching my girls how to care for their hair. When we do our weekly wash and daily maintenance, I tell them what I am doing. Yes, I do use silly references, but make sure to tag along the real name of the product. If you are a fly on the wall during these bonding moments, you will hear me telling Lil Sis that we need to make sure her Grandpa/Grandma hair gets its food. Grandpa/Grandma hair is what we call the ends of our hair; the oldest most fragile part. You will hear Lil Sis reply back with, "And don't forget my baby hair too, Mommy!". Big Sis is much older, so she always reminds me to not forget to give her a scalp massage. She L-O-V-E-S her scalp massages.

Big Sis and Lil Sis have different hair textures/type. Teaching them to love their hair shows to them that it is beautiful, not something that needs to be modified to be accepted. If they do choose to change it at an older age, it will be their choice and they would be well equipped with the tools necessary to maintain it.

These bonding moments will create longer impression on your child than a fun day at the best-est amusement park. These moments will be carried on through generations, after you are gone.

Carpe Diem!


12 comments:

  1. Awww.. that is touching! I love reading posts like this. And you are right, your impact will reach far beyond the here and now.

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  2. This is really cute! I have a 5 y/o w/ the same hair type as Big Sis, so I'm always reading your blog for tips (thank you -- please keep them coming!) I'm teaching my DD to love and care for her hair too. I chuckled the first time that I realized my DD was attempting to care for her dolls hair in the way that she sees me care for her hair. I LOVE IT!

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    1. Thanks. Kids copy us even when we do not realize that they do. It's good to know that she is learning so quickly even at a young age. Good job, Mom!

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  3. Wow, I cannot agree with you more. I am teaching my daughter to love her natural curly hair, she has 3C. My daughter is the only girl and unfortunately my mother is not part of our lives (her decision). Ms. Bree is one of the first biracial children born into my husband's family and I had to learn on my own how to care for her hair. My hair has natural waves but my mother hated that and often relaxed my hair (which caused lots of damage)and she was very clear how much she hated my hair. I WILL NOT do that and often tell my husband that he is NOT TO say negative things about her hair when she is around. My husband often tells me, "its my fault" or "I wish lil man had my hair and she had yours"... and I often tell him that I DONT MIND having to read, research and learn how to care for her hair, it is my job as her mother. She loves to do her hair, she loves when her hair is free and big, and I am teaching her that she has been blessed with beautiful curls and she can wear curls or wear it straight! Not to mention "hair time" is also "mommy & daughter time" and she loves it! What a great job you are doing!!

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    1. I must applaud you for the love that you have for your daughter despite the need to learn how to care for her hair. Your daughter will forever cherish the "mommy & daughter time" you give her.

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  4. Excellent post! I'm a fellow natural and first-time mom to a little girl. I definitely plan to teach her to embrace her natural hair. Thanks for posting this as a reminder to us all!

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    1. You're welcome. Enjoy bonding with your little girl.

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  5. Great article, sometimes I wonder if I am doing a good job at that. My daughter loves to try and comb and twist her hair but I am so afraid it tangling. I usually have to ask her not to touch it, and I wonder if that is having an impact on her. We got her "I Love My Hair" last Christmas and we do enjoy reading it together. She LOVES the afro style :)

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    1. Thank you. As parents, we always want what is best for our kids. It is important to let your daughter embrace her hair fully. The fear of tangling up the hair is always present, but we have to make sure not to let that fear cause the child to not want to touch her hair. What I do is while doing the hair, like washing it, I give my daughters a small section of their hair, and tell them to wash that section. I do, go back to rewash it prior to rinsing out. We do the same thing when it comes to twisting. If she shows interest, I give a small position and show how to twist. This is how Lil Sis learnt how to twist her own hair.

      As a child, I was always refrained from touching my hair and it did leave an impart. I didn't know what to do with my hair.

      You can also get her a doll with textured hair to practice on.

      I will be buying the book for the girls for Christmas. Thanks!

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